Autumn Update

Since my last entry we plunged headlong into fall and the new school year. Liam has taken to Transitional Kindergarten well, although he thinks his preschool class was more fun and complains that the playground at his new school has no sand. His teacher says he is chatty, smiley, and fun to have in class. Connor and I walk to pick Liam up from school every day, which is about 2.5 miles round-trip. The hour of walking allows Connor to people watch and wave at planes and helicopters flying overhead and I get some exercise built into my day.

Liam's reading lessons continue, and he is doing very well. With a couple of family visits and the occasional afternoon off because we have something going on, we won't finish the lesson book as soon as I anticipated. However, my goal is quality, not speed, and there we are right on track. Liam is doing excellent work, even if it is still an uphill battle to get him to sit still. (A lesson that is supposed to take 15-20 minutes typically takes 30-45.)

The Getty Center, where I often give tours.

I continue my work as digital assets manager and lecturer for Art Muse LA. Right now I give one or two tours a month, but business is relatively brisk right now and sometimes I have the opportunity to do more. I can't always get away, but when I do it's nice to feel like an adult and not a mommy for a few hours. 

Connor has handled Liam's daily school departure well and can't wait until he's the big boy heading off to school. Even though Liam is only gone for a half-day, they miss each other. Every day when Liam runs out of the school gate at dismissal, he runs straight for Connor and gives him a hug and asks, "Did you miss me, Connor?" If Connor is on his feet he does the same thing and runs to meet him. 

For the most part the fall season has been about school and reading lessons, but we have had some fun as well. The boys and I went up into the mountains near Yucaipa and did some apple picking. We also visited a mummies exhibition at the Natural History Museum and had fun at the Western Night Carnival at Liam's elementary school. 

All that, and we still managed to have a short but sweet--and chaotic--visit from my sister and her two boys. Having four boys under five under the same roof for a few days was exhausting, but we loved every bit of it. 

As October begins to wrap up, I'm looking forward to an end to the SoCal heat wave. I'm ready for cozy sweaters and hot cider and November weather!

Christmas 2012

Watching Christmas specials on Christmas Eve with Daddy.

All told Christmas 2012 was a fine holiday, and a fun and restful time was had by all. This was the first Christmas we truly played Santa Claus, waiting until Liam was dreaming of sugar plums before assembling his present in front of the tree. Santa brought him an awesome play kitchen this year, and let me tell you, his elves broke a sweat getting it together. The assembly required metal screws, but the plastic pieces of the kitchen had no holes drilled in them. Then there were all of the little sticker decals to stick in their proper places... Let's just say it was a relief when the kitchen was finally assembled just before midnight.

Santa brought Liam a play kitchen this year.

Liam is still a little young to really understand Christmas and all it encompasses, so he slept fitfully until 9 a.m. He never sleeps in, but of course he chose to do so on the one morning of the year mom and dad are looking forward to him waking up! When he did finally wake up and saw his new kitchen, it was love at first sight--he jumped in immediately and started "cooking." He also got a toy Dirt Devil vacuum because for a long time now one of his favorite pretend play activities has been to "ba-bong." That's Liam-speak for "vacuum." For months now, every toy he played with became a ba-bong, so we decided to get him an actual toy vacuum. He loved it, and once he fired it up, there was no stopping him all morning.

It was a fun day of presents, play, and eating, but we were all tired by evening and ready to call it a day. The only problem I'm left with is trying to figure out where to put the new play kitchen in our limited living space. I've already put old toys intended for younger ages in storage, but a little creativity will still be needed to organize those toys that remain in such a way not to clutter up the place and thus annoy me. With a November birthday followed by Christmas, Liam tends to get a huge influx of toys at the end of the year. Since we aren't done having kids, we aren't giving old toys away yet, so this annual toy juggling routine is here to stay for a few more years.

Liam "ba-bonged" for hours on Christmas Day.

Oh, and one last, encouraging note:  Christmas Eve brought an early Christmas present--Liam used his potty for the first time. Huzzah! He's since used it several times, but we still have a long journey ahead of us. For now he sees the potty as a kind of novelty thing he uses when he feels like it, not necessarily a way to leave diapers behind. So, he's not going to be wearing underoos any time soon, but we have taken a solid step in that direction. 

A bonus Christmas present for mommy--
Liam used his potty for the first time!

One Month In

It is one month into my new occupation as a full-time mom, and I have to say I think things are going rather well. Sure, the days can be exhausting and intense, but that is to be expected. Daily irritations and frustrations aside, so far this arrangement seems to be working for us. I miss certain aspects of working, naturally, but I've not had one moment where I thought, "Man, I wish I was at work!" When I'm with my son, I know I'm just where I need to be right now, and I've found that thought overrides any professional pangs.

Liam at UCLA. His shirt says "Future UCLA Grad."

In fact, if it's possible I think spending more time with my kid has made me even crazier about him. (Note: It's the "about him" in that last sentence that makes it an expression of love and not a simple factual statement... Just keepin' it real.) While close proximity and a constant marathon pace should be a formula for thin nerves and a short fuse, so far I've found it mostly reinforces the positives. Not that both Liam and I don't have our moments, of course--it's just that the positives ultimately seem to win out in the daily battles. That lesson has been a lovely, pleasant surprise.

Liam's first trip to the library.

Thus far my daily goals have proved to be a useful guide for our daily activities, as I hoped they would be. Liam is up with the sun (if not before), and while I caffeinate and peruse the morning news online, he gets his daily allotment of "Mickey Mouse Clubhouse" (a.k.a. "Mi Mow How"). After breakfast--Liam usually eats his and mine--we get dressed and head to the park around 9 o'clock. Nine has proved to be the golden hour for us at the park. Most days we have the place completely to ourselves, as most people don't start to show up until 10 a.m. or so. By that time, Liam is comfortably ensconced in his stroller with his sippy cup and morning snack while I push him up and down the sidewalks of our neighborhood hills and get in some decent physical exercise. I know this time isn't wasted because the hills are getting easier for me each week, but I won't be sorry when the temperatures around here finally cool off for good around Halloween.

Liam loves to chill with the iPad.

After our morning time at the park and a walk around the neighborhood, it's usually time for lunch, followed by naptime an hour or so later, around noon. God willing, Liam naps from 12-2 p.m., and I have a chance to do chores, each lunch, and/or collapse as I see fit. In the afternoon we do some reading or coloring, and have lots of playtime. If Liam is antsy and if it's not too hot out, we sometimes go for another walk before suppertime ushers in the evening routine and daddy's return.

Slide!

Painting in the Children's Gallery at LACMA.

All of these activities vary from day to day, depending on what errands or chores need to be accomplished, but as you can see we fell into a new rhythm fairly quickly. We even threw in some fun outings last month--we went to UCLA and had lunch with Eric, visited the zoo and LACMA, and made Liam's first visit to the library. There are still some kinks I want to work out, like finding some social activities for us, and learning how to make the best use of my (very limited) time without Liam. 

In other words, the Great Balancing Act continues, job or no job.

Liam loved running through all of the lampposts of "Urban Light" at LACMA.

A New Chapter

September 5th marked the end of the one chapter in my life and the beginning of another. Even though the course of this new season is as yet completely uncharted, I'm happy about the prospect of a fresh start and a chance for renewal and reinvestment in areas of my life that suffered inevitable neglect due to the realities of being a full-time working mother. For me, the past two years cast in sharp relief the challenges and frustrations a working mother and wife faces--many of which I didn't fully understand or appreciate until I found myself confronting them on a daily basis. I now have an unexpected opportunity to clear out the cobwebs of neglect in those challenge areas. This sense of purpose led me to outline a few of the broad goals I have for my time as a full-time mom (however long that proves to be). I say "broad goals" intentionally. After all, I want to be realistic--life happens. Not every one of these goals will be reached every day, but they will provide a good framework to go on.

1. A new routine. While sometimes one can become a slave to routine, I've definitely seen the benefits of having a family routine, and I don't want to lose too much structure now that my life is no longer ruled by a time clock. Everyone likes the comfort and feeling of productivity a routine provides, and I've found it a great survival tool as a parent. Also, a little structure to the day will go a long way in helping me meet the goals I have in mind. Generally speaking, I'd like our new average daily routine to include:
     a) Some time outdoors and physical activity--preferably before naptime... (see also: goal #2)
     b) Preschool educational activities for Liam:  reading, art making, music, etc.
     c) Daily family time--with two working parents whose commute home is over an hour, this one has always been our ideal, but hard to pull off in the past because Liam often falls asleep before Eric gets home.
     d) A little time at the beginning and/or end of the day for mommy-decompression

2. Get physical. The remaining three items on this list are mostly about me. As parents (especially mothers) I think the first thing we cut out of our lives when a baby enters the picture is everything we used to do for "me"--all of our energy goes into everything but taking care of ourselves. I have certainly been guilty of that, and I want to use this as an opportunity to work on striking a better balance. So, shooting for some physical activity each day is not just about giving Liam time to play outside or at the park, it's also about keeping me active, healthy, and feeling good as well.

3. Mental & intellectual health. Again, this one is about keeping me happy, healthy, and sane. I want to take time each day--even if it's just a few minutes--for stress-relief and decompression, and ideally some intellectual engagement (reading, writing, etc.). This new existence is a real change for me, not just in terms of  what I do every day but also in how I see myself and where I am in my life. I fully realize that keeping up my mental game is going to be key, and although it will be tough on some days to carve out time, I plan to take this goal very seriously.

4. Refocus and reinvest. There is no question that in the past the never-ending spin of the hamster wheel that is working motherhood got the better of me more than I would like. One of my hopes for this time is that mommy and daddy can find more time to be husband and wife now and then. "Date nights" certainly don't happen as often as they should. I'd also like to invest a little in some odds-and-ends improvements around the place to make it even homier and some organizational features that I haven't had the time to get to since we moved in last October. I'm not going to go "This Old House" on the place or anything, but I think a few small, inexpensive changes will go a long way.

I don't feel I'm over-reaching with any of these goals, but check-in with me a year from now and we'll see what I have to say about it! My first week of the post-Villa era was busy and activity-filled, thanks to a visit from my mom. Liam was more than happy to enjoy being spoiled by Grandma for a week, and I was thankful for a chance to do some of those odds-and-ends tasks I mentioned above and get organized. It was  nice to have some company and keep so busy this first week after being laid-off--it made for an easier transition and kept me from dwelling on the anxiety and sadness. It will take some time for those emotions to fade, I know, but this first week was a good start.

All right then--here we go!

At the Natural History Museum

Eric's birthday was this past Wednesday, and this weekend he wanted to celebrate by taking Liam to the Natural History Museum. He has lots of fond memories of visiting the museum from his childhood, and now he wants to share it with Liam. Of course, I love museums too, so this was a treat for the whole family. Until today, the only museum Liam had visited was the Villa, making this trip his first to the Natural History Museum. We arrived at the museum early, thinking to get in a good visit and still fit naptime in for Liam around midday. It turned out to be a good strategy all around, because as early-birds we had many galleries to ourselves when we first arrived. 

Although Liam was at times more preoccupied with attempts to extricate his favorite "ca-cas" (translation: goldfish crackers) from the diaper bag, as you can see from the pictures he did break free from the bondage of his stroller and engage with some of the exhibits. His favorite galleries were the dioramas and dinosaur halls, but the touchables gallery, where he could touch all of the exhibits, was the biggest hit. At his age touching is so important to learning and connecting, so that space was by far the one in which he was the most engaged.

Museum person that I am, I have to say that one of the things I enjoyed most about our visit was the novelty of just being a visitor. It was also great to have a family outing and spend some time together after so many weeks of Eric working weekends. Given the success of our first visit, I have no doubt we will be making another trip to the NHM again soon!

Daddy and Liam check out the African elephants.

Touching animal skins with Mommy in the touchables gallery.

Big dinosaur, little visitor.

My, what big teeth you have!

Really, Mom? Another picture?

A future paleontologist? A forensic anthropologist, perhaps?

July Photo Shoot

The Tail's End

Liam had almost no hair when he was born--except that tail!

My sister came out to California for a visit at the very end of June. Sure, she wanted to spend some time with Liam, Eric, and I, but she also had a mission--to eliminate Liam's mullet. The tale of my son's tail is one well-known to our close friends and family. When Liam was born, he had little to no hair, except for a tiny little tail of hair at the base of his head. As he grew, the hair on the rest of his head just couldn't keep up with the thriving natural mullet in the back. Although he's almost two years old, I resisted cutting it for a long time. After all, it was practically the only hair he had on his head and was a reminder to me that, as much as he's changed over the past twenty months, this bounding little toddler and the tiny newborn that came out of me were one and the same. Also, I admit to having hopes--faint as they may have been--that at some point his little tail would begin to grow into cute curls. Alas, it was not meant to be, and recently even my loving mother's eyes had to admit that it was time to reduce the party in the back to an acceptable level.

Before his first haircut, Liam's mullet
reached his shoulders.

So before she hopped a plane for California, I told Erin--a long-time proponent of ending the tail--to pack her clippers. Considering Liam is hardly of an age to sit still and have his hair cut, she did quite a good job giving her nephew his first haircut. We put him in his highchair and distracted him with some yummy chicken taco chili, which served to keep Liam occupied enough to almost ignore Aunt Erin, who cut his hair while he ate. As you can see, by the time he was done with his supper his tail was at an end and he had his first cute little boy haircut.

Ta-da--no more tail!

And what do a mommy and auntie with access to a fancy digital SLR camera do with a cute little boy who just got a snazzy new haircut? Why, dress him in an adorable little outfit and take him out to for a photo shoot, that's what! Check out my next post to see some of the hard won results of our efforts.

A June Visit

Liam and Grandma on a walk by the Redondo Beach Pier.

Mid-June brought another visit from Grandma Myers, who was delighted as ever to spend some quality time with Liam. It was good to see Mom and even better to have a few days of free, live-in, more-than-happy-to-do-it child care. I got to slip out to see a movie one afternoon, and Liam got a whole suitcase full of goodies from Grandma--including some workbooks, flash cards, and other preschool resources I can use with Liam when I stop working in September. We had a good visit, but it was somewhat marred by the nasty combination of a head cold (for Liam and I) and teething pain (just Liam), which made most nights less than restful. Nonetheless, a good time was had by all!

His hat says, "Get me on the first flight to Grandma's!"

A Morning at the Pier

Looking toward Redondo Beach pier.

Yesterday was another gorgeous, sunny SoCal morning, and Liam and I took full advantage of it. We are lucky to live within walking distance of Redondo Beach Pier and the Veteran's Park and Memorial. The pier provides a scenic ocean-front walk with plenty of sidewalk for the stroller and the opportunity to do some wave watching, which Liam loves. When Liam grew tired of the confines of his stroller, Veteran's Park provided plenty of wide-open space for him to run around in as well as a little playground area. 

He had a blast climbing all over the playground equipment, playing in the sand, and chasing squirrels around the park's grassy knolls. In short, it was the perfect way to tire him out for naptime! If he had his way, he would probably never leave, but the promise of some graham cracker cookies and a sippy cup full of cold water persuaded him to get back in his stroller. While he munched on cookies and sipped on water, I got my workout for the day in by hiking us both back up to our neighborhood. The walk down to the beach is lovely (i.e. downhill), but going back is an uphill slog all the way. Even so, there's no question that the hot, sweaty return trip is totally worth the opportunity to get out and enjoy the sunshine and outdoor activities. At the moment it appears most likely that I will become a full-time, stay-at-home mom in early September when I'm laid off (more on this in a later post). If so, Liam and I will definitely be paying regular visits to Veteran's Park.

Squirrel chasing.

Liam loves watching the waves.

Easter Egg Hunt

Compared to last Easter, when Liam was only a little over five months old and could barely sit on his own next to his Easter basket, this Easter was action-packed. Although the idea of an "egg hunt" still escapes him, he totally got into the idea of running around the backyard with his cousins, basket in hand, and (occasionally) picking stuff up off of the ground. Luckily Mommy and Daddy were there to help him out, and there were even a few times when he followed through, picking up an egg and putting it in his basket. But for Liam, the hunt was mostly about running back and forth across the grass with his basket. He had a blast, and all of that running around helped tire him out for his nap--score!

As I mentioned in my last post, Liam is doing his best to test out his new sense of independence, which for me is simultaneously exciting, amusing, and frustrating. My frustration is mostly a result of my limited ability to communicate with my tenacious toddler, but there are signs that things might get a little easier very soon. For awhile now Liam has been able to follow basic verbal instructions or directions, but in the last two weeks or so he has started answering questions with a nod--that's a full-body nod, leaning back and forth--or a "Nooooooo!" or even "No, no, no, no, no, no!" Clearly, the boy has "no" down. As much as I try to introduce the word "yes" into his vocabulary, I think "no" will continue to dominate conversations with Liam for now. Consequently, when he answers a question I'm not sure if he truly means what he says, but we are at least one step closer to breaking through another verbal communication barrier. Until then, we'll take what we can get, and try our best to give "yes" a fighting chance to break into Liam's ever-growing vocabulary.